In the LDS faith, it is all or nothing type thing. We are taught, that if Joseph Smith was a prophet, that the Book of Mormon is true, we have a prophet today, and everything else down to what we eat and drink. If one thing is wrong, that everything is crumbles. We are taught to be daily converted and to gain a testimony of everything.
When I break down some core beliefs of the church, the number one would be faith in Jesus Christ and the teaching to grow closer to him. I think the 2nd most important thing is the importance of families.
Many men who struggle with same sex attraction (gay boys), go to therapy for some miracle to happen. In the best cases I have heard of, these boys can control how much gay porn they watch, and in some cases feel some attraction to girls. From what I can tell from the stories I have read and the people who I talk to, they never really change much. I believe that if President Monson announced that indeed it is okay for members to have same sex relationships, these individuals would rejoice and run to the opportunity.
I cannot believe in a church that teaches that God would create young men and women that at their very core love the wrong gender. Even if my new resurrected body did come with some straight man feature, it would be so sad to have what I am drawn to and the gender I am able to love sucked out of me. I would then cease to be who I am and in many ways just a shell.
So if I do not believe that God has is it planned for men to only marry women, then I must not have a testimony in the church itself. Does this mean I am not Mormon anymore? Should I just remove my name from the records of the church and be done with it? If then, should I start investigating other religions?
I do believe in a loving God. I do believe that when he told me to be baptized into the LDS Church it was His will. I just wonder now if it was because He was trying to get me to know Him and the Mormon Church was his best instrument to do so.
Lot's to think about.
I have a message
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I have a message. My message is to Love. Jesus said love everyone. When I
say that, I mean everyone.
When I add to that to love those who are different, sp...
5 years ago
6 comments:
I realte to this post so well. When I was younger I went to therapy and tried to pray the gay away, but, alas, it never worked. I am still a homo. lol. And though it has taken a long time I have come to the belief that God would not make just a select few of his sons and daughters to not be able to love on this Earth. I dont think that it is important to God what is inbetween a persons legs. To focus on that so much, like the church does, is bringing God down to a level of human-ness that he is above. I think that he will judge us based on the intent of our heart and how we treated others in this life. Did we try and grow closer to him? Did we do our best? I dont think that he is going to check our sexuality on a sexuality meter and determine whether we are worthy or not. I honesltly belive that the church has the most truth of any other church out there, but I think they are woefully misguided when it comes to homosexuality and focusing on the letter of the law and obession with straight marriage.
Thats just the gospel according to Konrad though. ;)
The "all or nothing" fallacy continues to amuse and frustrate me. I actually wrote about it myself a while back, you might find it mildly interesting Chris: http://scrumcentral.blogspot.com/2009/01/all-or-nothing.html
I was going to bring up the "all or nothing" thing too...I think that letting go of that is what helps me be at peace with the church and take what I want from it while leaving the parts I don't like.
As a heterosexual female, I cannot comment on or allow myself to believe that I can even begin to empathize with what it is you are going through, the pain you are feeling, or heartache you experience.
However,as your friend and a fellow member of the church I can relate to knowing that feeling of not quite believing or questioning why things are the way they are. All I can say to you is pray for your answers. As you said you believe the Lord brought you into his church so you could know him, trust in him to bring you the answers that you are looking for. If you ask for them he will answer, you just have to listen.
How true about the Mormon view being "all or nothing." I am still trying to work out this disconnect, but am too afraid to choose one way or the other. Congratulations for choosing a direction and heading that way, rather than staying in a perpetual middle ground with no progress.
@Rob and David: Thanks for your correcting me in that. Maybe I should say I am more of an all or nothing person. If I sat in a temple recommend interview today, I would not walk out with the bar coded piece of paper allowing me to enter the house of the Lord. When I go to church I don't feel like I belong there, I pray for answers before reading church talks, scriptures, and going to conference, and it no longer feels special. The church will always have a special place in my heart, but really with claiming a religion, I myself am all or nothing.
@Jenn, Konrad, and Horizon...Thanks for the support :)
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