California Supreme Court Upholds Ban on Same-Sex Marriage

So I have been thinking a lot on the subject. I have never really cared because I am not sure I care if I am "Married". I want a life long relationship with someone I live. Beyond that, it is not super relevant. But here is my beef. People are focusing on how immoral "Gays" are. When in reality California is pretty dang immoral, so is the world. Even here in Utah. So maybe the religious folks should worry less about a population trying to be more moral by telling them monogamous relationships are bad for them and random sex is the same thing in their eyes, I think they should be telling the world, "Let's love each other, value meaningful relationships, and encourage people to be the best they can be".

So here is my Gay Bashing moment. Why in Utah are we having rallies and protest mainly after the fact. If we want our voice to make a difference, let it be heard before the vote in great force. Not after when it is too late. Let us build the case that even as Gay men and Lesbian Women, we are good people that can make a difference in the world. We should have moral teachings and goals in out world, and a country founded on religious freedoms, seeking to take the high road, should encourage that.

Okay , that' my peace.

Someone to Come Home to

So, I have been thinking what are the benefits of being "Gay". I am not the partier type so the lifestyle of Clubs, Drugs and Sex is not appealing in the least. So why do it?

I guess it is to hold on to that hope that someday I might have someone that loves me for who I am. Someone who I can be strong for and they can be strong for me. Someone that helps me want to be better, that gives me power to overcome obstacles while we carry each others.

So I guess, now comes the fear. What if this person never comes? Then what is the point of being "Gay".

I guess that's why we take chances in life...Hopefully it will happen!

Prayers for Bobby

So I just finished watching Prayers for Bobby, as recommended by a friend. I wish sometimes things were more simple. I feel sometimes like Bobby. I love God, love his teachings, but what I am taught ofter contradicts what I feel, what I believe.

I really believe we are all here to make this a better place. Guys who like other guys and girls who like other girls are still dying or wish they were dead. Families still feel like they would be better with out a son, than with a gay one. People should be free to feel the way the feel.

My question is for myself, how am I going to make this better. How am I not going to be one that likes other boys...who dies.

Just trying out mobile blogging

So back to blogging

I was so good about blogging (at least in my own head), and then I just stopped. No real reason, but now I think I am back. This blog is to dedicated to helping me find myself. Most of my life I have given to others, but now it's time to figure out who I am, what I want in my life, and where I am going. With this new found glory, I hope to take it and make the world an even better place.

So who am I?

Things I know for sure: I am Chris. I am a 25 year old guy. I am a resident of Utah. I am a convert to the LDS church at age 16. I am someone who doesn't go to church, but loves his beliefs and God. I am someone who is very attracted to guys, but don't feel like I should have to "come out" to the world. I am looking to share my life with. I am someone who loves people and life.

Things I am not sure of: I am surrounded by people who love who they think I am, which differs some from who I really am, which makes feel very alone at times. I am confident about my abilities, but not so much about me as a person, which I want to change. I want to be a part of the world, not just the gay world, or the LDS world, or the social service world, or the party world, but just the world as a whole. I don't fully fit one category, but love people in all categories and I want to learn not to fall into the trap of groups or stereotypes. When people think of me I don't want them to think of the gay guy, or the mormon (which many already do), I want people to think of me.

So why blog?

I'm not sure why people blog, but I have learned when I take time to write my randomness, I also read other blogs and learn so much from them about me.

I would also love for people to send me insight and feedback on my thoughts. I believe there are so many people around us so that we can teach each other. Please teach me.

Well Peace out for now, wish me luck, and good luck to ya'll!